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Accepting help and reaching out for the support you deserve

February 25, 2014


HELP! First of all, I don't normally ask for advice on the Internet, but I'm not sure where else to turn. My daughter has MS and I'm really worried about her. She's got four kids and a lot on her plate. Not to sound overly dramatic, but I'm desperate to find her some extra support, and some for me, too. I do all I can but I feel like it's never really enough.

She's having trouble keeping up, so I'm really worried.

Concerned About my Daughter with MS

Nurse Claire replies:

I can tell by your post that you really care about your daughter. And I just want to say that I think she's lucky to have you in her life. When you have MS, having a support network is so important.

There are several national organizations for people with MS and their care partners: the National MS Society, the Multiple Sclerosis Association of America, and the Multiple Sclerosis Foundation. Each organization provides different things so I would encourage you and your daughter to think about joining all three. Talk to your own healthcare provider too, he or she may have even more resources for you. And remember, MS One to One Nurses are available 24/7 if you have questions.

Sometimes well-intentioned family members offer to “help” in a broad way, and this is an opportunity for you or your daughter to give them specific tasks. It might mean asking them to run errands, babysit or maybe even just do the dishes. As you and your daughter know, MS is too big to take on alone. So say yes to help from your family, groups, or other places, like your church or synagogue. And remember, it takes a certain kind of strength to accept help.

Please don't forget that your needs are important, too. You must do your best to not burn out. Think of this as a distance race, not a sprint. Take some breaks. Schedule some “me time.” Do something you enjoy. Maybe even consider joining a support group. And please educate yourself about MS as best you can. Sometimes our ideas about what lies ahead are worse than what we can really expect. Real information like this may help you relax.

— Nurse Claire, MS One to One® Nurse

Nurse Claire ; Family and Friends ; Relationships


MS One to One® Nurse, Claire

Nurse Claire
Helping since 2013
Posts: 10

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